I stepped out of wholefoods with $149.39 of nicely packaged yet remarkably overpriced organic goods. This had become a ritual in days past.

The aestheically pleasing checkout lady smiled as she grabbed my Amex card.

My card was worn and tattered from the hundreds of swipes on their machines and now had to be run manually.

She smiled and said something polite yet highly detached as to not break her daily patterns.

Then something strange happened. A bald security guard armed with a 38 caliber revolver in his holster approached me.

He was young, cleanly shaven, built like a truck and wearing an impeccably pressed uniform with shiny and newly polished shoes. His brass name tag was recently polished. It read in big bold letters “REYES”.

“Can I look in your bag sir? Do you have a reciept?”He asked ,resting his hand on his pistol.

I was totally thrown off. Something was wrong. This was obviously not your normal geriatric security guard standing guard aimlessly at the local supermarket. There was something military about him. I had seen this before. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it but for a second I got the feeling I only get when being shaken down by a Federale in a 3rd world country. I could smell it. Could this be? A fedreale at Wholefoods?

The word FEDERALE wouldn’t leave my mind. I had to find out.

I decided to speak to him in Spanish and asked where he was from. “Mexico City” he replied. “Were you a police officer there?” I inquired. “Still am, how did you know?” he replied proudly

He asked again for my reciept and if he could check my bag.

Wow! I quickly realized that this may be my only chance to mess with a federale with no real repercusions. My sadistic side took over.

I decided at this stage to test his patience. I quickly fabricated a plan that was to be my own personal protest . I disregarded his request as if I didn’t hear it. I smiled politely. I then slowly sipped my juice and said nothing more.

I could see his discomfort level rising amongst the gathering crowd of soccer moms and neuvo riche inhabitants who began to whisper amongst themselves. A crowd had gathered to watch this situation develop.

As he realized the situation getting worse and the possible repercussions if I did infact have a receipt, he quickly became more polite. He removed his hand rested on his pistol. Sweat started to appear on his brow. His breathing became more shallow.He was nervous.

I savored the moment until the feeling of being victorious washed over me. Could this be some strange karmic justice for years of paying off corrupt Federales in strange places? I let out a small yet discreet exhale. “Ahhh”.”Justice is good.” I thought.

After about 15 minutes,I felt bad for him. We were at a draw. I handed him the receipt. He pretended to read it carefully. He quickly handed it back and offered to shake my hand.

” Sorry sir. If you ever need anything, please don’t hesitate to ask.My name is Reyes” He said

He promptly dissapeared to the back of the store.

“Oh no, Thank YOU officer! Gracias.”

Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

No virus found in this incoming message.

Checked by AVG – www.avg.com

Version: 8.5.287 / Virus Database: 270.11.58/2062 – Release Date: 04/16/09 08:12:00

Share and Enjoy:

| | | | | |